Surviving Medical Residency: Powering through and Becoming the Doctor I Was Meant to Be

People often imagine residency as something out of a medical drama, fast-paced, exciting, full of heroic moments and meaningful breakthroughs. Shows like Grey’s Anatomy, ER, The Resident, New Amsterdam, and The Pit make it look cinematic with equal parts chaos and romance. I love those shows (I’ve probably watched Grey’s Anatomy more times than I can count), but the truth is, real-life residency is both more painful and more beautiful than television ever shows.

The Harsh Beginning

My journey through residency was one of the hardest, loneliest, and most transformative seasons of my life. I entered my intern year full of excitement and drive, but it didn’t take long to realize how tough it would be. I had a senior resident who was especially harsh on me during those first months constantly critical, sometimes unkind, and often impossible to please. It was disheartening and exhausting, and there were nights I questioned whether I was good enough to make it through.

A Hug That Said Everything

I still remember one night during my very first week. My friend Eve and I had just finished a long shift on the labor and delivery ward. We walked out together in silence, completely drained. In the parking lot, right before getting into our cars, we just hugged, a long exhausted hug that said, We’ll survive this. It was a moment of shared strength between two tired interns trying to hold themselves together before going home to sleep and do it all again the next day.

What Residency Demands

Residency tests you in every way possible, your stamina, your confidence, your compassion, and even your faith in yourself. There are sleepless nights when you go home too tired to eat, too drained to think, but still replaying every patient encounter in your head, wondering if you could have done something better. You learn to live on coffee and adrenaline. You learn how to hold your emotions together in the face of heartbreak. You learn to keep going even when every part of you wants to stop.

The Mentors Who Changed Everything

But residency is also where I met some of the kindest and most nurturing mentors, doctors who taught with patience, who modeled grace under pressure, who reminded me that medicine is ultimately about humanity, not hierarchy. Those are the people who kept me going when things felt impossible. Looking back now, I realize both kinds of teachers — the harsh and the kind — shaped me in ways I never expected. The difficult ones built my resilience; the compassionate ones restored my hope. Both helped me grow into the physician I am today.

Finding Myself Outside The Hospital

Being single during residency had its own challenges. My life revolved around the hospital, long hours, overnight shifts, and the rare golden weekend that felt like freedom. I spent my days off doing the simple things that helped me feel alive again watching a movie, eating out, shopping, or just laughing with friends. That small slice of normalcy kept me balanced. Around that time, I also decided to take up karate. At first, it was just a way to feel safer walking to my car late at night after shifts. But it became much more, a place to build confidence, to meet people outside the medical world, to feel strong again in my own body. It reminded me that even in the most demanding seasons, there’s always room to grow stronger and rediscover joy.

What Surviving Medical Residency Really Taught Me

Those four years were grueling. But as I look back now, I see how they sculpted me, not just into a better doctor, but into a stronger, more empathetic woman.

Surviving medical residency was not just about clinical endurance, but about learning who I was under pressure and uncertainty.

Residency was the tunnel, and finishing it was stepping into the light.

Every hard shift, every sleepless night, every challenge was worth it.

Because in the end, I didn’t just become a doctor. I became this doctor: one who leads with compassion, sees meaning in struggle, and understands that strength and kindness are not opposites, but partners.

Stepping Into The Light

Residency was one of the hardest chapters of my life, but also one of the most meaningful. It taught me that strength isn’t just about pushing through, it’s about showing up, even when you’re exhausted, and still choosing to care. It’s about finding small moments of light, a shared hug, a kind word, a lesson learned that remind you why you started.

For Every Doctor Still In The Tunnel

No season lasts forever. The long nights, the criticism, the exhaustion, they all pass. What remains is the growth, the purpose, and the deep knowing that you are capable of more than you ever imagined.

So to every young doctor, every woman chasing her dream while fighting fatigue or doubt, keep going. The tunnel may feel endless now, but there’s light waiting for you, too.

Let’s keep finding that light together. Let’s keep flourishing and blooming one shift, one challenge, one victory at a time.

As Taylor Swift says, “I’ve been the archer, I’ve been the prey.”

Residency made me both the one aiming for excellence and the one learning to survive it.

Now I’d love to hear from you: What moments in your own journey made you feel like both the archer and the prey?

Share your story below: your words might be the light someone else needs today.

Let's Flourish and Bloom Together